Saturday, August 20, 2011

Let Your Freak Flag Fly



Ah, I have so much to say on this week's topic that I'm not sure where to begin! So, please forgive me if this seems all over the place.

 I suppose I'll start by saying in regards to sexual-orientation that I believe love is love, no matter the gender, sex, race, religion, etc. I am fortunate to live in Massachusetts, where gay marriage/same-sex marriage is legal and recognized as valid (by the state, as of 2004). It's incredible that only six states, most in the north-east, have legalized gay marriage. I had one professor in particular the made a great inpact on me. She also happens to be married, to a woman.  It was heart-breaking to hear her say, as we discussed the Family Medical Leave Act (FMLA) excludes same-sex partners for caring for their spouse. This is because gay marriage is not recognized on a federal level. FMLA has many benefits, it allows a spouse to take off work for a period of time- to care for a sick spouse, sick child, or have bonding time with a newly adopted child- without being fired or face any backlash from your employeer.  But if you are gay in America, you do not receive such benefits.  This will not change until gay marriage is legalized in the entire country.  . Ironically FMLA was passed the same year as "Don't Ask, Don't Tell." Health insurance will also not provide coverage for a gay spouse.

Approximately forty years ago, marriages between other races were made legal. It's shocking since as the US, we see ourselves as such a progressive society despite the archaic excuses (the contents of religious text) and bigotry from years past. It's amazing to think that if my uncle and aunt were born one generation earlier, they would not have been able to marry (he's American of Norwegian descent, she's from Belize). It hurts to think that my friends will not be able to cover their significant others and any possible children they or their partner may have under their insurance or be able to take time off work to tend to their needs.  This is frank injustice.

In my retail 'career', I used to work at a store in the mall that sold 'adult toys'.  It was honestly the most rewarding moments while working retail I have ever had. Sounds odd, but hear me out.  Customers would come to the store, and nervously peek around at the 'Luv' section (oh so corny title for the products). There I learned that people worry way too much about someone knowing that they 'pleasure them-selves'. Honestly, everyone does it, will do it, or should try it. (There's a severe lack of information provided in sex-ed classes provided in public schools about the self and discovering your own sexuality. It was never brought up. It was all about "wrap your junk, here's how not to get preggers, the end." and the focus was exclusively about male-female relationships.) I enjoyed educating the customers, asking what they wanted out of a 'toy', helping provide solutions for bedroom problems, correcting misconceptions- I truly miss working in this aspect of retail.  Sadly my boss was a jerk (I believe I discussed that situation in my very first post), and I quit because of her.'

On a personal level, I wouldn't say I'm extremely sexual,  which seems contradictory to my knowledge of adult novelties. I'm old-fashioned in the sense that I'm not about to jump into bed with anyone.  And most of my friends are either extremely embarrassed by sexual topics (one friend almost choked on her drink when I told her over a lunch meet-up in Boston about my job at the time) or on the extreme end of the spectrum where it comes up in conversation at every party.  I have yet to tell friends and family that I'm bi-sexual.  I see it as something that I'll deal with when it happens, when/if I ever date a girl. I feel no shame about my sexuality. I just don't see why to bring it up out of the blue.

So, in conclusion to my piece-y post: be who you are. If you're interested in kink, be kinky. Dress how you want to dress. Want to fly solo, keep things no-strings-attached- more power to you. Your life is yours, no one elses'. Let your freak flag fly. And honestly, you're not a freaky as you think- there's always someone out their who feels the same. No one is going to live your life but yourself. Make it count.

Awesome video (click it, you know you want to):

3 comments:

  1. I do not know how to begin my comment regarding your post. I want to be respectful towards you and your opinion. I ask that you not be offended by comment but instead receive it with an open heart. My view point is that of a Christian who is against same sex relationships and marriages but who has a compassionate heart for each and every person regardless of their lifestyle. While I can go on and on about what I think of this subject, I would rather speak to you of what God thinks of it, and his opinion should be the only one of the utmost importance to all of us. Romans 1:26-27 clearly states "for this reason God gave them up to dishonorable passions. For their women exchanged natural relations for those that are contrary to nature and the men likewise gave up natural relations with women and were consumed with passion for one another, men committing shameless acts with men and receiving in themselves the due penalty for their error." If these actions are condemned in the Bible then it is quite clear that this lifestyle is a sin in God's eyes. You say at the end of your post that our lives our ours and belong to no one else, but you could not be more wrong. Jesus gave up his life for ours, so that we would not perish in our sin, is this how we repay him back? By rebelling against the one who saved us, just so we can get our way? Is it really worth it in the end? Forgiveness of all sins, including homosexuality, is available to all of us through Jesus Christ.

    Thanks for hearing me out and I ask God as this moment to bless you and yours. Much Love.

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  2. It's not really a 'lifestyle'. It's innate, not created and acted out in daily life. Did you choose to be "straight"/heterosexual? Was it a conscious decision?
    I too can go on and on about this subject. The Bible says many things, it's a book that is open to interpretation. And much of it is exaggeration to make the tales more gruesome, cautionary, or fanciful. And the Bible wasn't written by 'God' but by several different people across thousands of years. And as people do, they inject their bias into their teachings. Maybe Paul didn't like those who were homosexual. Perhaps he wrote such a thing due to, at that time period, there was a serious problems with instructors taking advantage of their students. I see that as a pervert and abuse of power issue, not a gay issue.
    The Bible as encourages practices that are inhumane. Slavery, abduction, and how other races are less than your own race: "However, you may purchase male or female slaves from among the foreigners who live among you. You may also purchase the children of such resident foreigners, including those who have been born in your land. You may treat them as your property, passing them on to your children as a permanent inheritance. You may treat your slaves like this, but the people of Israel, your relatives, must never be treated this way." (Leviticus 25:44-46 NLT) Should slavery make a comeback in America? Many events have been proven by science to been acts of nature (The parting of the Red Sea, Jesus walking on water).
    Even if, hypothetically, I believed in a god- my life would still be mine to live. 'God' blessed humans with free-will. People decide whether they are going to follow the ten commandments, or break each and every one of them. And I must have missed "Thou shall not have same-sex relationships" in the Bible. Many aspects of the Bible have contradicting takes, for example the final moments of Christ and what was said before he died.

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  3. There's no 'rebelling'. Homosexuals aren't children 'going through a phase'. I fear not for my soul or body, as I know what will happen. I will die, then shall be buried or cremated. The end. Believe what you wish, but I do not believe in any deities. 'God' to me is like believing in the Tooth Fairy, an imaginary being we only hear of -yet rely on others to keep their existence know (books, myths, oral tradition). Feel free to believe what you want to, in Christianity. That's why religions are 'faiths'. It's faith-based. My opinion, is if you're going to follow the Bible, you can't pick and choose what you like and ignore the bad. Because the Bible does encourage slavery. Sickening: " When a man strikes his male or female slave with a rod so hard that the slave dies under his hand, he shall be punished. If, however, the slave survives for a day or two, he is not to be punished, since the slave is his own property." (Exodus 21:20-21 NAB) Such 'lovely' stories like Sodom and Gomorrah. & God on rape: "If a man is caught in the act of raping a young woman who is not engaged, he must pay fifty pieces of silver to her father. Then he must marry the young woman because he violated her, and he will never be allowed to divorce her." It's unimaginable- being raped then forced to marry your attacker. Raping captives of war is encouraged. Woman, non-Christians, and people forced into slavery are "property". It's said plain as day.
    Religion aside, what reason do you have to be against same-sex marriage? If we are all God's children, and we are created in his image, then why would God be again homosexuals? You can't be "compassionate" no matter the "lifestyle", including homosexuals, and be against same-sex marriage. Because that would mean you desire to alive one's suffering. And one way to do so is understand the benefits and the importance of legalizing same-sex marriages.
    If you were not allowed to be married, think how that would affect your life. If you desired children, many places would not allow you to adopt. And even if you managed to do that- your spouse would not be a legal guardian. If you perished, your partner could, possibly, not be able to have custody of a child they raised. If one got sick and the other took time off, there would be no paid personal time and they'd likely could lose their job because no laws are protecting their rights.

    I know there's others who feel like you do, some feel like I do. Thank you for sparking this discussion. C:

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